Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: creative writing, fiction, flash fiction, short story, story, writing
just thought today i’d check in on the one-eyed girl. she’s been missing, as you’ll remember.
I’m in a hole. The bastard’s guys found me and put me down some deep dark hole where I can’t see anything and all I can hear are footsteps and muffled voices up above me during what I figure must be daytime. Other times I don’t hear anything. I figure I’ve been down here weeks already… Well, that’s probably just because it’s really, really, boring being stuck in some hole by some assholes not able to do anything or see anything. Probably only been a day or so.
This must be what it’s like to be blind.
I’ve always been kindof scared of being blinded. All I have is the one eye and what if someone poked it or I got a shard of glass lodged in it or something? I can’t stand to look at those people who get around with canes and wear dark glasses. Sometimes if I see one of them coming I’ll cross the street just to avoid them. They give me the creeps, seriously.
People always think if you act bad ass then you’re fearless. That’s good. That’s what I want them to think. I’m not scared of anything.
They opened up some kinda trap door in the ceiling and I saw just a patch of light for a few minutes while someone chucked a couple bottles of water, a bucket, and what feels like a paper McDonald’s bag with french fries and a couple cheeseburgers in it.
I wanted to say “Please, let me out, I won’t tell anyone, I’ll do whatever you say just don’t keep me in the dark where I feel like I’m going crazy because I can’t see anything and it feels like it’s been days already.”
What I really said was “You fucking asshole if I ever make it out of here you’ll spend the rest of your fucking life looking over your shoulder because I’m gonna kill you and your children and your fucking dog, too.”
If they know you’re scared it means they’re winning.
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Vanessa,
I feel like there was a clear relationship in the last two posts.
I want to say that I think you are really on the edge of the point where you are going to face recovery toe to toe and win most days. There is something very real in these two posts.
I loved the story, and you know what? I saw so much of Jes in that post. But she’s learning that the badass Jes was keeping everyone from knowing the real Jes, who is a compassionate and wonderful person, who just needs to understand the the WHOLE world isn’t going to understand her. That doesn’t mean that she needs to hide from the whole world, but it does mean she will need to really search herself for what is truly meaningful to her and focus her life and her heart there. She doesn’t need to try to fit into any defined pattern. But she will find the relationships and her own form of happiness by pursuing her OWN meaningfulness.
And you will too.
You are truly in recovery now, Vanessa. Even on those days where you binge and purge.
You’re figuring out the world and you’re figuring out you. You’re gonna be OK, kid. I have so much confidence in you. And I have confidence in Jes.
Comment by Mrs. B August 31, 2008 @ 8:11 pm