Some More of God’s Greatest Mistakes

Nothing happened.  Well of course nothing happened.  Clare hadn’t really been expecting a clap of thunder and the magical appearance of the Devil in her dormitory room that night and you weren’t either if you had any sense.  This is the point where most people would have left it and forgotten the whole thing ever happened by the time they woke up the next morning.  In Clare’s case, however, that is not what happened.

Clare had always wanted to believe in Good Things like God and Family and Policemen.  She was a nice girl and she did believe in these things, really she did, except for one or two little questions that she’d have liked to have answered.  Like, if the police are there for my protection, why are the only dealings I’m ever likely to have with them either after I’ve done something wrong, or after something terrible has already happened to me?

In short, Clare was just a tiny bit too intelligent to be happy while not being quite intelligent enough to realise that this is a very common human problem.  So when she considered her offer to sell her soul to the Devil for the knowledge of whether Hell and Heaven actually exist she hit upon one serious logical flaw that prevented such a bargain from ever being consumated. 

Hmmm, she thought, I’ve inadvertently caught the Devil within a paradox.  Even if the Devil did want to take me up on my bargain he’d have had to show up in some dramatic instantaneous way that proved to me exactly what I’d wanted to know before I’d ever signed the contract.  Having my proof right in front of me already there would be no possible incentive for me to then turn around and sign a contract giving him my soul for further reinforcement of that knowledge.

This was the moment when Clare came up with the idea to advertise her offer of her soul over the internet.  (to be cont.)