Some More of God’s Greatest Mistakes

things could be worse, right?  this time he might be serious.

Death’s a great guy, when you get to know him.  A total buddy!  We go way back, see, to when I met him in the bar the night Old Jerry (the old bartender) had his heart attack.  He came in and I said I know you’re here on business but why not have a beer with the guys first, give Old Jerry an hour or two to say goodbye to his wife and give yourself a rest old fellow.  Your job must really take it out of you!

So he turned to me and pointed a bony finger at me and said in a low, chilling voice, “I wasn’t here for Old Jerry, Tom.”

I damn near dropped my beer!  But of course he was kidding.  Such a kidder, that guy.  We told him he was welcome any time and since then he’ll drop in for a beer with the guys once or twice a week.  Sometimes more, when there’s a major war or a famine or a natural disaster or something.  It’s no picnic, being Death.

Still, he seems to keep up his spirits.  Always tries to kid us and tell us he’ll be “seeing us soon” or “watch that first step, it’s a doozy” or what have you.  But, you know, I’m not as young as I used to be.  Just turned 90 last month if you want to be specific about it.  And I wonder if, just possibly, what with him showing up here at my home and all…  Do you think this time he might be serious?